Sleep. It might be the thing you think about most as a parent. At Babyslover, we know that sleepless nights can feel endless, and finding a solution that actually works feels like discovering gold.
One approach many parents turn to is the Ferber method, a sleep training technique developed by pediatrician Dr. Richard Ferber. If you’re curious about whether this method might work for your family, you’re in the right place.
Here’s what we’ll cover: what the Ferber method actually is, how to adapt it for your baby’s age, step-by-step guidance for each stage, and real talk about what to expect. We understand this is a big decision, and we’re here to help you make it with confidence.
Contents
What Is the Ferber Method?
The Ferber method is a progressive waiting approach to sleep training. Essentially, you let your baby fall asleep on their own, and if they cry, you wait progressively longer periods before checking on them. Each check-in is brief and calm—no picking up or extensive soothing.
The goal? Teaching your baby to self-soothe and fall asleep independently over time.
Important note: The Ferber method isn’t for every family, and that’s completely okay. Some parents find it helpful, while others prefer gentler approaches. We believe you know your baby best.
Ferber Method for 4 Month Old
At 4 months, sleep training is a gray area. Your baby’s circadian rhythm is just beginning to develop, and they still have genuine nighttime hunger needs. Many sleep experts recommend waiting until closer to 6 months, but some parents begin introducing this method around this age.
Before You Start:
- Confirm with your pediatrician that your baby is ready (typically 4+ months, good health, feeding well)
- Ensure your baby isn’t going through a developmental regression or major milestone
- Have realistic expectations—progress may be slower at this age
The 4-Month Approach:
Start with a consistent bedtime routine. This might be a bath, cuddles, and a story. Keep it the same every night.
Place your baby in their crib drowsy but awake. Let them know it’s sleep time with a calm voice.
If crying starts, use these wait times:
- Night 1-3: Wait 1 minute, check in (2 minutes max), leave
- Night 4-7: Wait 3 minutes, check in, leave
- Week 2: Wait 5 minutes, check in, leave
When you check in, keep it brief. A gentle hand on their chest, quiet words, and leave. The goal is reassurance, not soothing back to sleep.
What to expect: At 4 months, you might see improvement within 3-5 nights, but some babies need longer. This is completely normal.
Ferber Method for 6 Month Old
Six months is often the sweet spot for sleep training. Your baby has better circadian rhythms, can go longer between feeds, and is developmentally ready to learn self-soothing.
Before You Start:
- Your baby should be sleeping in their own space (crib, bassinet, or nearby)
- Establish a solid bedtime routine (15-30 minutes)
- Make sure daytime naps are consistent
The 6-Month Approach:
Create a calming bedtime routine. Think bath time, pajamas, a story, and cuddles. Aim for the same time each night.
Place your baby in the crib awake. Say goodnight and leave the room.
If your baby cries, use these wait times:
- Night 1-2: Wait 1 minute before checking
- Night 3-4: Wait 3 minutes before checking
- Night 5-7: Wait 5 minutes before checking
- Week 2+: Wait 10 minutes before checking
During check-ins, keep them under 2 minutes. A calm voice, gentle touch, and reassurance are enough. Don’t pick up your baby or turn on lights.
Progress through the waiting times only if you see improvement. If night 3 is still very difficult, repeat the same times for another night or two.
What to expect: Most 6-month-olds show significant improvement within 5-7 nights. Some take 2-3 weeks. Consistency is key.
If you also want to use the Ferber Method for daytime sleep, you can read our full guide here: Ferber Method for Naps: Complete Guide with Chart.
Ferber Method for 18 Month Old
Eighteen months brings new challenges: separation anxiety, toddler independence, and a stronger will. Your 18-month-old might climb out of their crib or get upset about boundaries. Sleep training at this age requires patience and consistency.
Before You Start:
- Ensure your toddler is in a bed they can’t escape from easily (or a crib with high rails)
- Your toddler should have an established routine
- Consider if there are any big changes (new sibling, moving, starting daycare)
The 18-Month Approach:
Bedtime routine becomes even more important. Include predictable elements like books, songs, and cuddles. Keep it to 20-30 minutes.
Set clear expectations in simple words: “It’s sleep time now. I’m leaving. I’ll be back in the morning.”
Place your toddler in bed and leave calmly.
If crying or calling for you starts, use these wait times:
- Night 1-2: Wait 2 minutes before checking
- Night 3-4: Wait 4 minutes before checking
- Night 5-7: Wait 6 minutes before checking
- Week 2+: Wait 8-10 minutes before checking
When you check in, stay calm. A brief interaction, reassurance, and back out. Your toddler may ask for water, snuggles, or bathroom trips. Address genuine needs quickly, then leave.
What to expect: This age can be tougher. You might see 2-3 weeks of adjustment. Your consistency matters more than your toddler’s immediate cooperation.
Ferber Method for 1 Year Old
At 1 year old, your baby is becoming more aware, mobile, and emotionally complex. They’re also likely taking one or two naps and might have established sleep habits (good or challenging ones).
Before You Start:
- Your baby should be eating solid foods and not dependent on night feeds
- Confirm with your pediatrician there are no health concerns
- Have a consistent nap and bedtime schedule
The 1-Year Approach:
Routines are everything at this age. A 20-30 minute bedtime routine sets the stage for success.
Put your baby down awake but drowsy. This is important—they need to practice falling asleep on their own.
If crying begins, use these wait times:
- Night 1-2: Wait 1 minute before checking
- Night 3-5: Wait 3 minutes before checking
- Night 6-7: Wait 5 minutes before checking
- Week 2+: Wait 5-10 minutes before checking
Check-ins should be quick and calm. Keep the room dim. Your baby might cry harder when they see you—that’s developmentally normal. Brief reassurance, then leave.
For nighttime awakenings: Respond to genuine needs (fever, injury), but use the same waiting method for crying due to sleep association.
What to expect: One-year-olds often improve within 5-7 nights. Some take longer. Staying consistent through tough nights makes the difference.
Ferber Method for 2 Year Old
Two-year-olds are testing boundaries, expressing preferences, and sometimes struggling with big emotions around sleep. They might have fears (the dark, being alone) or resistance to bedtime routines.
Before You Start:
- Your toddler has an established routine
- You’re prepared for increased resistance and testing
- You have a secure, safe sleep space (toddler bed or crib, depending on your setup)
The 2-Year Approach:
Create a predictable routine: dinner, bath, pajamas, stories, cuddles. Keep it consistent.
Give clear, simple warnings before sleep time: “In 10 minutes, it’s bedtime.” This helps your toddler transition.
Place your toddler in bed and leave calmly, even if they protest.
Use these wait times:
- Night 1-2: Wait 2 minutes before checking
- Night 3-5: Wait 4 minutes before checking
- Night 6-7: Wait 6 minutes before checking
- Week 2+: Wait 8 minutes before checking
During check-ins, acknowledge their feelings briefly: “I know you’re upset. You’re safe. It’s sleep time.” Keep interactions short.
Your 2-year-old might cry hard, get out of bed, or call repeatedly. Stay calm and consistent. Each time they get up, calmly return them to bed.
What to expect: Two-year-olds often need 2-4 weeks of consistency. Regression is common with travel, illness, or changes. That’s okay—restart your method calmly.
Ferber Method for 3 Year Old
Three-year-olds are incredibly verbal, imaginative, and skilled at negotiating. Sleep training at this age often means addressing why they’re resisting sleep (fears, excitement, needing control) as much as teaching the method itself.
Before You Start:
- You’ve talked with your child about the plan (age-appropriate)
- Your child is in a toddler bed or big kid bed
- Daytime routine is consistent
The 3-Year Approach:
Talk with your child about sleep training beforehand. Use simple language: “We’re going to practice falling asleep in your bed. I’ll be nearby if you need me.” This gives them understanding and control.
Bedtime routine should be calming and predictable: dinner by 6 PM, wind-down activities, stories, cuddles, then bed.
Place your child in bed and say goodnight calmly.
Use these wait times:
- Night 1-3: Wait 3 minutes before checking
- Night 4-6: Wait 5 minutes before checking
- Week 2+: Wait 10 minutes before checking
When checking in, keep it brief. You might say: “You’re doing great. It’s sleep time. I’m just checking on you. Rest now.” Brief physical reassurance, then leave.
Your 3-year-old might request water, bathroom trips, or cuddles. Address one genuine need per request, then it’s back to sleep.
What to expect: Three-year-olds often improve in 1-2 weeks with consistency. They might test boundaries more than younger kids, but they also understand explanations better. Stay calm and compassionate.
Sample Ferber Check-In Chart (For All Ages)
Here’s a visual guide to help you track your Ferber method progress:
| Night | Age 4-6 Mo | Age 12 Mo | Age 18 Mo | Age 2-3 Yr |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 1 min | 1 min | 2 min | 2-3 min |
| 2 | 1 min | 1 min | 2 min | 2-3 min |
| 3 | 3 min | 3 min | 4 min | 3-5 min |
| 4 | 3 min | 3 min | 4 min | 3-5 min |
| 5 | 5 min | 3 min | 6 min | 5-6 min |
| 6 | 5 min | 5 min | 6 min | 5-6 min |
| 7 | 5 min | 5 min | 8 min | 6-8 min |
| Week 2+ | 10 min | 5-10 min | 8-10 min | 8-10 min |
How to use this chart:
- Start at Night 1 with your baby’s age group
- Wait the recommended minutes before checking in
- Move to the next night, adjusting wait times as shown
- If your baby has a very difficult night, you can repeat the previous day’s wait times
- By week 2, most families move to longer intervals
Remember: This is a guide, not a strict rule. Every baby is different. Trust your instincts and adjust as needed.
Conclusion
At Babyslover, we believe you have the knowledge and strength to make the right sleep training choice for your family. The Ferber method works well for many families, but it’s not the only option out there.
Whether you choose to use the Ferber method or another approach, remember this: there’s no perfect way to sleep train. Only your way. Trust yourself, stay consistent, and know that seeking help—whether from your pediatrician, a sleep consultant, or your support network—is a sign of strength.
Sleep is possible. You’ve got this.
Related FAQs
Is the Ferber method safe for my baby?
At Babyslover, we want you to know that the Ferber method has been studied since the 1980s. When done with a healthy, developmentally ready baby (typically 4+ months), it’s considered safe by most pediatricians. Always check with your own doctor before starting sleep training.
What’s the difference between the Ferber method and “cry it out”?
Great question. The Ferber method is not pure “cry it out.” You’re checking in regularly and reassuring your baby, just at increasing intervals. Pure cry it out means not responding at all. The Ferber method is more gradual and includes parental contact.
What if my baby gets sick during sleep training?
Pause your sleep training. Take care of your baby’s health first. Once they’re better and feeling normal, you can restart gently. One pause won’t undo your progress.
Can I use the Ferber method for naps?
Yes, you can, but we recommend starting with nighttime first. Naps are trickier because your baby might genuinely be tired or need to rest. Once nighttime is more stable, you can apply similar principles to naps.
What if the Ferber method isn’t working after 3 weeks?
Some babies respond differently to different methods. That’s completely okay. Consider talking with a pediatric sleep consultant or your pediatrician about other approaches. There are many ways to help your baby sleep well.
At Babyslover, we’re here to support your parenting journey. Sleep training is personal. Whatever you choose, we believe in you.
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