20 Rules For 20 Year Olds Living At Home That Every Parent And Adult Should Know

As many 20-somethings choose to live with their parents well into adulthood, family dynamics can get complicated. While this can save money for both sides, it also requires some ground rules to keep the peace. After all, you aren’t a kid anymore – your parents can’t just boss you around or pry into your business. At the same time, it is still their house, and you need to respect that.  

The good news is that harmonious cohabitation is possible with clear communication and boundary-setting on both sides. Today we here share a comprehensive list of house rules for 20 year olds living at home.  This list of house rules covers everything from contributing financially to the household to being mindful of each other’s space and privacy. With these simple house rules for 20-year-old adults in place, families can build understanding and enjoy drama-free home life.

20 Rules For 20 Year Olds Living At Home

Following house rules promotes harmony and respect between parents and their adult children under the same roof. Here you explore 20 rules for 20-year-olds living at home. This list of house rules for adults covers contributing to the household, open communication, personal responsibility, privacy, and more. And with outlining fair standards, parents can nurture their young adults while maintaining a comfortable home environment.

Respect Your Parents’ Authority And Household Rules

As a 20-year-old adult, it can be tempting to disregard or resist your parents’ household standards since you are older now. However, when you continue to live under your parents’ roof, it is important to recognize and respect their ultimate authority in their home, even if you do not always agree. This means abiding by basic rules they have set for the household, such as expectations around completing chores, having visitors over, noise levels, coming home at a certain time, etc. 

Make an effort to have mature, open conversations with your parents to better understand the reasons behind their rules. Recognize that many household guidelines are about maintaining order, responsibilities, and security for the family as a whole. While you should feel comfortable discussing any rules you disagree with or wish to revisit over time, obeying the household’s basic structure demonstrates maturity and self-discipline as a young adult. Respect your parents’ position as head of the household while you remain living there.

Contribute To Household Chores And Responsibilities Regularly

You must regularly contribute to household chores and responsibilities. Taking the initiative to help clean common areas, do laundry, wash dishes, run errands, care for younger siblings, and maintain the home’s upkeep shows accountability and maturity.  

Sit down with your parents to collaboratively map out chore expectations – rotate duties like cleaning bathrooms, kitchen, and vacuuming; schedule weekly tasks versus daily ones. Meeting these chore commitments without your parents having to remind you exhibits reliability. Additionally, proactively look for ways to be helpful – prepare family meals, grocery shop, and do yard work.

Pitching in demonstrates awareness and care for the family dynamic. Establish your role as a contributor rather than just a resident relying on others. Consistent effort to help the household run smoothly earns respect.

Keep Your Living Space Clean And Organized

Keeping your personal living space tidy is an important display of maturity and consideration. Your bedroom and/or other individual spaces like a bathroom or storage area that your parents allow you to utilize should be kept orderly. Make your bed, put away clothing, maintain surfaces like desks and shelves, and properly store belongings. Additionally, establish cleaning routines to regularly vacuum, dust, take out trash/laundry, and organize spaces. 

Not only does an organized living environment project self-sufficiency, but it also shows respect for your parent’s home. Containing messes in your zones minimizes your impact on common household areas that others inhabit.

It also makes you accountable for your organizational systems versus relying on others to clean up after you. Maintaining your living space minimizes family tensions about cleaning and demonstrates adulthood. Lastly, orderly surroundings also promote better mental clarity and habits.

Communicate Openly And Respectfully With Family Members

Living in close quarters as an adult can sometimes lead to tensions between parents and adult children. but maintaining open, respectful communication is key to making the situation work smoothly for everyone. Have regular check-ins with your parents one-on-one or as a whole family to discuss logistics like household responsibilities, schedules, finances, or expectations. This prevents confusion or frustration on either end.

When issues inevitably come up, address them calmly without accusations or disrespect. Listen to understand your family members’ perspectives before clearly explaining your viewpoint or feelings. Communicating respectfully even during disagreements demonstrates emotional maturity and accountability. Finding compromises and resolutions will be easier when people feel heard and understood.

Maintain A Reasonable Curfew And Inform Your Parents Of Your Whereabouts

Although you are an adult, maintaining a sensible curfew and keeping your parents updated on your plans is wise while living under their roof. Discuss reasonable weeknight and weekend curfews based on your schedule and habits. This provides structure and accountability for both you and your parents. 

Additionally, give your parents a general sense of your daily schedule and share when plans deviate substantially from the norm. For instance, if you’ll be home late from work, spending the night elsewhere, going away for the weekend, or attending a concert, give them a heads up. This is not them tracking or controlling you, but rather caring about your safety and whereabouts as their child. 

Inform them if plans change last minute as well. Having open communication about your schedule allows parents to not worry and shows consideration as a member of the household. Follow through consistently with agreed-upon curfew times to build trust and autonomy.

Help With Grocery Shopping And Meal Preparation When Possible

Contributing to household tasks like grocery shopping and preparing meals is a productive way for adult children living at home to add value. Offering to create a grocery list, do the food shopping for the family, or head to the store for missing ingredients shows initiative and care. When your schedule allows, use your own money to cover the costs to ease the burden. 

Additionally, prepare meals for the whole family several nights a week or assist your parents with cooking. Learning skills like following recipes, chopping vegetables, monitoring stoves, marinating meats, or baking creatively sets you up for independent living in your place. Not only do these actions give your parent cooks a break, but they also provide an opportunity for meaningful time together in the kitchen. Taking on grocery and cooking contributions exhibits maturity – and the whole family gets to enjoy delicious results!

Contribute Financially To Household Expenses If You Have A Job Or Income

 It is reasonable for parents to expect you to contribute financially if you have a job or income. Have an open-money conversation with your parents. If you are working full-time, offer to pay a small portion of rent or utilities. Even contributing 0-300 goes a long way to easing family expenses. If you work part-time, offer to pay a percentage or set amount each month. Handle bills for expenses like your phone, car, or extras to establish fiscal awareness. 

If you cannot afford these set amounts, discuss other options – pay the internet bill, buy some groceries weekly, put gas in family cars, and treat the household to dinner. Any amount, even small, symbolizes maturing responsibility. If on hiatus from school or seeking work, establish expectations for financial contribution upon being employed. Handling payments demonstrates accountability and readiness to someday financially support your residence.

Follow Guidelines For Guest Visits And Be Mindful Of Noise Levels

When living in your parent’s home as an adult, it is respectful to follow any household guidelines regarding visiting guests. Sit down together and discuss expectations around when and how often visitors are allowed over, whether significant others can spend the night, parameters around parties/gatherings, etc. Understand the reasons behind any wary guest policies – younger siblings at home, previous issues, or general preferences.  

Additionally, be very mindful of noise levels during visits. Keep music, TVs, and conversations at reasonable volumes, especially later at night out of consideration for your parents and neighbors. Inform guests of household quiet hours and occupancy limitations.

Limit the number of visitors at one time depending on your family’s comfort level. Following courteous guest and noise policies preserves your privilege to host company. It also reaffirms maturity regarding the comfort of other household members while you remain in your parent’s home.

Respect Your Parents’ Privacy And Personal Space

Even though you are an adult, it is important to respect your parents’ need for personal privacy and space when living in their home. This means being aware of and honoring boundaries regarding their bedroom, office, or any personal recreational areas in or outside the home. Understand if certain spaces are essentially “off limits” for you to access without permission or invitation. Allow your parents periods alone or to have private conversations even in common areas. Refrain from prying into their schedules, relationships, finances, or other matters they wish to keep confidential.  

Giving your parents adequate alone time and respecting their boundaries reinforces courtesy and maturity on your end. This will encourage them to also honor reasonable privacy expectations you may have.

Take Care Of Your Personal Hygiene And Health Needs

Caring for your health and hygiene is an important act of self-sufficiency as an adult child at home. Attend to daily habits like showering, dental care, grooming, and laundry with consistency. Manage medical, dental, and therapy appointments independently. Have a cleaning routine for private living areas and contribute equitably to household cleanliness.  

Monitoring your hygiene reduces the burden on others and shows maturity. Furthermore, maintaining cleanliness and health preserves communal spaces that all inhabit comfortably. Handling your physical and mental well-being demonstrates resilience and the ability to self-manage as an independent adult, even while still under your parents’ roof.

Adhere To Household Rules Regarding Technology And Screen Time

While devices and entertainment are ubiquitous parts of life, it is important as an adult living at home to follow any household guidelines set around technology and internet use. Your parents may have rules about keeping internet usage in common rooms versus privately, limiting overall screen time, avoiding devices at the dinner table, turning off WiFi overnight, or parameters around video games and TV volume. Respect the technology standards and restrictions your parents have, even if you disagree.  

Remember that things like keeping shared spaces tech-free, being present during family time, and moderating consumption of media encourage healthy habits and relationships. If you take issue with screen time rules, have a constructive discussion explaining your perspective. Offer compromises like using headphones, designating tech-free family hours, or setting your responsible schedules.

Attend Family Events And Participate In Family Activities

Making an effort to attend family events and participate in activities is a good way to nurture connections while living at home as an adult. Join in for regular happenings like weekly family meals or game nights. Put annual occasions like holidays, vacations, and reunions into your schedule as well. Attend important milestones such as siblings’ performances, athletic events, ceremonies, or celebrations . 

Being present for family time shows you still value your relationship even as you grow more independent. Participate actively in activities versus just observing. Offer to take turns planning or hosting special meals or outings too. If unable to attend events due to other commitments, explain your reasons to your parents respectfully.

Keep Your Parents Informed About Your Plans And Decisions

Out of respect for your parents and the household, keep your parents filled in on major life plans and decisions you are making as a young adult. Give them reasonable notice about substantial changes related to your education, career, finances, relationships, living situation, health, or anything impacting the family dynamic.  

For example: share that you are changing colleges/majors, starting a new job, entering a serious relationship, making big purchases, considering moving in with others soon, or managing new medical treatments. Even as an adult, your choices still affect your loved ones emotionally and logistically. Allow your parents insight so they can provide support during transitions. 

Additionally, openness about your decisions continues relationship transparency even as dynamics shift toward independence. Keeping parents updated is not asking permission, but rather caring that they understand this new phase of your adulthood journey.

Be Honest And Accountable For Your Actions

If you make a mistake or poor decision, be honest and own up to it rather than hiding or shifting blame. For example, if you break a household item, overspend funds cause you to miss a payment, or break a rule regarding guests – acknowledge it transparently. Explain yourself maturely, apologize for impacts, and remedy situations responsibly. 

Accountability for missteps – both minor and more serious – demonstrates maturity to your parents. It also reaffirms that as an adult child, they can still rely on your integrity despite new independence. Additionally, discussing issues calmly and resolving problems indicates respect for maintaining household harmony. Learning to take ownership as a young adult, without making excuses, will serve you enormously when navigating the greater world.

Respect Siblings’ Belongings And Personal Space

If you have younger siblings still living at home, be especially considerate about respecting their personal belongings and private spaces. As the older child, you have an opportunity to model responsible behavior and healthy boundaries. Ask permission before borrowing items like clothes, gadgets, books, or car access. Avoid entering younger siblings’ bedrooms or bathrooms without consent. Be mindful of noise levels and friend visits impacting their comfort. 

Honor requests from siblings around privacy or property peacefully. Return borrowed items promptly and in good condition. Offer sincere apologies if you mistakenly impact their possessions or space. Though seemingly trivial, these small tokens of respect from an older sibling can mean a lot. It demonstrates you value their autonomy too.

Seek Permission Before Borrowing Or Using Items That Belong To Others

It is wise to always ask permission before borrowing or using items belonging to others. Whether you need to grab a tool from the garage, take the car for the day, utilize kitchen appliances, or temporarily use household basics like towels or electronics – request consent and access politely from the owner.  

Gain clear approval to borrow items, plus parameters around the duration and care. This shows respect for personal property and preserves trust. Additionally, always return borrowed items promptly and in equal or better condition after use.

Seeking permission and adhering to agreements demonstrates awareness of appropriate boundaries. It also upholds maturity even when still relying on parental resources in some ways. Maintaining these courtesies helps ensure you and your possessions receive similar care and respect from household members.

Handle Conflicts Or Disagreements Calmly And Respectfully

Living in close quarters with family as a young adult can inevitably lead to some conflicts or disagreements at times. However, as a member of the household, it is important to always handle these situations calmly and respectfully.

If you argue with your parents or siblings, avoid yelling, making hurtful comments, or issuing threats. Instead, take a break to collect yourself if emotions are running high before revisiting the issue. Clarify misunderstandings that may have triggered tensions. Share your perspective using “I feel” language rather than accusations. Listen sincerely as others explain themselves too. 

Pursue Your Educational Or Career Goals With Dedication

As a young adult still under your parents’ roof, actively working towards your career or educational aspirations demonstrates maturity and earns respect. Use the support system your family provides responsibly to make consistent progress. Whether enrolled in higher education courses, or career training programs, employed with growth opportunities, or responsibly seeking work – dedicate time and effort toward forward motion. 

Set clearly defined next steps and deadlines to maintain accountability in meeting your goals. Frequently update your parents on achievements big and small to show initiative and follow-through. Ask them for advice navigating professional contacts, academics, interviews, or other milestones when helpful. Pursuing growth ambitiously, even during transitional times, will establish independence sooner.t.

Show Appreciation For The Support And Care Provided By Your Family

It is important to actively express genuine appreciation for the support and care your family provides. Recognize the multifaceted ways your parents subsidize your experiences daily through shelter, food, amenities, emotional guidance, and more. Beyond material provisions, appreciate cherished relationships cultivated over lifetimes that continue enriching your life.  

Show gratitude often through verbal thanks, small thoughtful gifts, written notes, or quality time. Offer to help with household tasks or listen after a long day without being asked. Explicitly tell your family how much you value their ongoing presence in your life. Conveying appreciation lets your loved ones know their nurturing efforts make a difference, despite the stresses of having an adult child at home.

Continuously Strive To Contribute Positively To The Household And Family Dynamic

As an adult child at home, actively add value to the household and family dynamic through ongoing positive contribution. and recognize that you are still an integral part of the family unit, with opportunities to enrich daily life. Offer creative ideas for new traditions, home projects, or bonding experiences. Volunteer to take on extra chores when others are busy or not feeling well. Find small ways to uplift loved ones through affection or encouragement. 

Cultivating positivity and pitching in without expectation conveys that all members of a family interdependently shape its happiness. It demonstrates that rather than just passing time in your childhood home, you want to actively nurture the spirit of the family, to every member’s benefit. This empowers you with a sense of purpose and belonging.

Read Also Complete List Of House Rules For Adults Living With Parents

Conclusion On Rules For 20 Year Olds Living At Home

Successfully cohabitating with adult children requires empathy, communication, and boundaries from both parents and young adults. And with clarifying expectations around contribution, responsibility, privacy, and respect, households can avoid tension and nurture maturity. While parenting an adult child brings evolving challenges, it also allows families to strengthen bonds for the long term through this transitional time.

The 20 rules outlined aim to help 20 rules for 20 year olds living at home understand reasonable guidelines to follow while living at home. Contributing to chores, sharing plans openly, pursuing goals seriously, and preserving family relationships are just a few ways for young adults to earn autonomy while understanding the necessary compromises of multigenerational living. 

Meanwhile, parents allowing independence while maintaining some structure learn to gradually release authority as children gain competency. With compassion and gradual steps towards self-sufficiency, under-one-roof living can transform from compromise to opportunity for both adult children and parents. As the famous quote goes “There are ships, and there are ships that pass in the night.” Family ships that learn to sail together — rather than separately — will be stronger as they navigate all of life’s backwaters and high seas.