Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly: Hope and Help for Overwhelmed Moms Seeking Answers

Every mother, her son is one of the greatest joys of their life. she gives them everything – our love, care, attention. But nothing hurts more deeply than feeling mistreated by the son we cherish. If your adult son disrespects you, ignores you, exploits you financially, or worse, you aren’t alone.

Many moms face agonizing sons who treat their mothers poorly. But Don’t worry With the help of professional support, open communication, firm boundaries, and self-care, you can improve the relationship with your son.

Many mothers face heart-wrenching pain and despair when their sons treat them poorly. But Rebuilding trust takes effort, and with the help of this many moms have restored broken bonds with their sons.

This blog offers insight to help overwhelmed mothers seeking answers on coping when sons Treat Their Mothers Poorly. Take the first step – together, you and your son can find a healthier way to restore your broken Relationship. With your compassion and perseverance, son hurt can heal.

Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly
why do sons disrespect their mothers

Why Some Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly?

There are a variety of complex reasons why some sons mistreat their mothers. Here are some of the most common causes:

  • Mental Health Issues: Sons struggling with depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, or other mental health problems may have difficulty regulating their emotions and lash out at their mothers. Their condition impairs their ability to cope with stress and manage their feelings appropriately.
  • Substance Abuse: Sons addicted to alcohol, drugs, or both are more likely to act erratically, irrationally, and abusively toward their mothers. Intoxication lowers inhibitions and clouds judgment.
  • Trauma and Abuse: If a son suffered abuse, neglect or trauma in childhood from his parents or others, he may harbor resentment toward his mother for not protecting him. This can come out as mistreatment in adulthood.
  • Entitlement: Some sons feel entitled to money, housing, caretaking, or other support from their mothers indefinitely. They become angry and abusive when she sets boundaries around her generosity.
  • Influence of Others: Sons with friends, partners, or family members who lack respect for women may absorb chauvinistic, abusive attitudes and direct them toward their mothers.
  • General Frustration: Sons who are depressed, unemployed, struggling in relationships or otherwise dissatisfied in life may take out their frustration and anger on their closest target – their mother.

While these factors explain some mistreatment by sons, they don’t excuse abuse. Understanding the roots of the behavior can help moms cope and assist sons in changing.

Signs Your Son is Mistreating His Mother

Here are some signs that a son may be mistreating his mother:

  • Verbal Abuse: He calls her names, yells, insults, cusses at or threatens her. This includes saying cruel, hurtful things.
  • Emotional Withdrawal: He gives his mother the silent treatment, ignoring her calls and texts for long periods. He’s emotionally distant and shuts her out.
  • Violating Boundaries: He disregards her rules, spaces and possessions. He invades her privacy, moves things without permission, etc.
  • Breaking Promises: He frequently commits to doing something for or with his mom but doesn’t follow through. His word means nothing.
  • Financial Exploitation: He repeatedly borrows money from her but rarely repays. He might steal jewelry or possessions to pawn.
  • Manipulation: He lies, denies wrongdoing and twists the truth. He might gaslight her, undermining her reality.
  • Sabotage and Revenge: To “get back” at his mom for perceived wrongs, he might damage her property, ruin her reputation, harm her pets.
  • Intimidation: Through words, actions, destroying property or showing weapons, he instills fear in his mother.
  • Physical Violence: He gets physically aggressive by shoving, grabbing, slapping, punching or inflicting other physical harm.
  • Belittling: He constantly criticizes her intellect, abilities, appearance and character. His goal is to humiliate.

If a son engages in any of these behaviors, it’s time for the mother to carefully re-evaluate the relationship and get help.

Common Reasons Sons Mistreat Their Mothers

There are some common causes behind sons mistreating their moms:

  • He feels entitled to her caretaking and resents boundaries
  • He abuses substances which lower inhibitions about behavior
  • He struggles with mental illness or personality disorders
  • He learned disrespect for women from his father or other males
  • His significant other encourages him to sever family ties
  • He harbors resentment about his childhood
  • He takes frustration over finances, jobs, or relationships out on mom

My Son Only Contacts Me When He Wants Something

The Impact on Mothers When Sons Treat Them Poorl

Being mistreated by an adult son can profoundly impact a mother’s mental and physical health. Common effects include:

  1. Depression – Feelings of sadness, hopelessness, unworthiness and despair are common. Mothers may withdraw socially and cry frequently.
  2. Anxiety – Mothers often experience severe worry, panic attacks, insomnia and pounding heart rate when dealing with an abusive son.
  3. Physical effects – Stress takes a toll through headaches, stomach upset, body aches, and exacerbation of conditions like high blood pressure.
  4. Guilt and self-blame – Mothers tend to blame themselves, wondering what they did wrong in raising their son. This compounds emotional distress.
  5. Financial hardship – Sons who steal money or possessions from mothers create financial woes. Moms may struggle to pay bills.
  6. Isolation – To avoid judgment, many mothers isolate themselves from family and friends due to their son’s behavior.
  7. Loss of joy – Activities mothers once enjoyed hold no pleasure. Sense of purpose is destroyed by their son’s mistreatment.

Seeking counseling, joining support groups, leaning on loved ones and practicing self-care can help mothers regain health and joy despite a son’s poor Treat.

Why Are Daughters Mean To Their Mothers?

How to Communicate With a Son Who Mistreats His Mother?

10 Tips for communicating with a son who mistreats his mother:

  1. Choose the right time – Approach him to talk when he seems calm and sober. Avoid times when he seems irritated or intoxicated.
  2. Use “I feel” statements – Use non-accusatory language focused on how his behaviors make you feel, not blaming him.
  3. Listen without judgment – Let him share his perspective and frustrations. Don’t interrupt or criticize.
  4. Suggest counseling – Recommend family therapy to facilitate communication in a safe, mediated space.
  5. Set boundaries – Clarify what behaviors you will no longer accept from him. Follow through consistently.
  6. Limit time together – If needed, limit contact until he can treat you respectfully. Don’t accept abuse.
  7. Have an intermediary – Have a trusted friend or family member join conversations to prevent escalation.
  8. Write a letter – Write out your concerns and need for change rather than confronting them face-to-face.
  9. Avoid ultimatums – Threatening to cut off contact unless he complies can backfire. Focus on your limits.
  10. Get advice – Speak to domestic violence resources about effective communication strategies.

With patience, compassion, and self-care, you can stand up against mistreatment and hopefully reconnect.

why do sons forget their mothers

Rebuilding Trust and Respect in the Mother-Son Relationship

Tips for rebuilding trust and respect in a mother-son relationship where the son has been mistreating his mother:

  • Family counseling – A therapist can facilitate productive conversations and conflict resolution in a safe environment. Having a neutral third party prevents escalation.
  • One-on-one counseling – The son should pursue individual counseling to work through any underlying issues leading to poor treatment of his mother.
  • Support groups – Groups like Al-Anon provide peer support and tools for setting boundaries with difficult adult children.
  • Consistent boundaries – The mother must enforce clear boundaries around respectful treatment and limit contact if those boundaries are violated.
  • No contact order – In cases of physical violence, a formal no contact order may be appropriate for the mother’s safety.
  • Address substance abuse – Any addiction issues fueling the son’s behavior must be treated. Sobriety is essential.
  • Build him up – Verbally recognize your son’s positive qualities and actions to reinforce good behavior when it happens.
  • Consider medication – If mental illness is a factor, psychiatric medication and treatment compliance are key.
  • Apologize when needed – If the mother has done something to contribute to the rift, sincerely apologizing opens doors.
  • Offer forgiveness – When making amends, the son needs forgiveness to move forward. However, boundaries remain.
  • Be patient – Rebuilding respect and trust takes time. Some backsliding may occur.

With dedication from both parties, even very strained mother-son relationships can transform into healthy bonds.

When to Seek Outside Help for an Abusive Son?

Here are some signs it’s time for a mother to seek outside help regarding an abusive adult son:

  • Physical violence – Any physical abuse, no matter how minor, necessitates intervention. Contact police immediately.
  • Threats of violence – Threats to harm you or loved ones, even if he hasn’t acted on them, should be taken seriously.
  • Intimidation – If he uses intimidation to provoke fear through words, actions or destruction of property.
  • Weapons – If he has access to weapons or threatens to use them, get help right away.
  • Strangulation – Seek medical care after any choking, loss of consciousness or restricted breathing.
  • Sexual abuse – Any forced or coerced sexual contact warrants immediate police involvement.
  • Financial exploitation – If he steals extensive money or possessions, change locks and passwords and file a report.
  • Stalking behaviors – Harassing, following, monitoring you or showing up uninvited requires intervention.
  • Mental health issues – Suicidal threats, delusions, or inability to care for himself necessitate psychiatric help.
  • Substance abuse – You cannot force treatment, but you can refuse to enable substance use and get support.

No mother should silently endure abuse by her son. By seeking outside resources like police, social services, domestic violence agencies, medical professionals, or legal protection, you can regain safety and peace.

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Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly Quotes

Here are some thoughtful quotes about sons who treat their mothers poorly:

  • “A son’s coldness is the deafening cry of mother’s private sorrow.” – Santosh Kalwar 
  • “The wound of a mother’s rejection will never heal, because there is no balm for it.” – Doug Cooper
  • “Making your mother cry is as bad as making history weep.” – Raheel Farooq
  • “Mothers can forgive almost anything in their darkest hour; except bad sons.” – E.A. Bucchianeri  
  • “There is no king who has not had a slave among his ancestors, and no slave who has not had a king among his.” – Helen Keller
  • “If you are ungrateful to your mother, you have blasphemed against a soul entrusted to you by God.” – Waheed Jensen 
  • “We think caged birds sing when indeed they cry.” – John Webster 
  • “It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father.” Pope John XXIII

The pain of a damaged mother-son relationship goes profoundly deep. But there is also hope; healing can happen when honesty, empathy, and accountability lead sons back home to repentance.

Related FAQs Why Do Sons Hurt Their Mothers

What are some signs my son is being abusive and disrespectful?

Signs of abuse include name-calling, threats, ignoring you, violating boundaries, financial exploitation, gaslighting, damaging property, physical aggression, and emotional withdrawal. Any mistreatment is unacceptable.

What causes a son to be mean and hurtful to his mother?

Causes can include mental illness, substance abuse, childhood trauma, entitled attitudes, negative influences, financial motives, and general life frustrations that he takes out on his mother.

How does it impact a mother when her son treats her poorly?

Communicate when he’s calm, use “I feel” statements, listen non-judgmentally, suggest counseling, set boundaries, limit time together if needed, and avoid ultimatums.

How should I communicate with my son about his hurtful behavior?

Communicate when he’s calm, use “I feel” statements, listen non-judgmentally, suggest counseling, set boundaries, limit time together if needed, and avoid ultimatums.

What can I do to rebuild a healthy mother-son relationship?

Family counseling, individual therapy, support groups, apologizing if needed, addressing addiction issues, building him up positively, and giving forgiveness while maintaining boundaries.

Why do sons disrespect their mothers?

Reasons include resentment, mental illness, substance abuse, attention-seeking, exposure to domestic violence, entitlement attitudes, and influence from negative peers or father figures.

Conclusion on Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly

If your son mistreats you, please know that you are not alone and his behavior is not your fault. Many moms face the agonizing heartbreak of Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly. The reasons why sons disrespect their mothers range from mental illness and addiction to childhood resentments and negative influences.

Although deeply painful, the situation is not hopeless. With compassionate communication, professional support, boundaries, and self-care, you can begin to heal and reconnect with your son. In time, he may gain insight into the impact of his actions. Others have repaired damaged mother-son relationships with effort and patience.

You deserve to feel cherished, respected, and safe in the relationship that was your first love. Don’t blame yourself for your son’s poor treatment. And don’t silently withstand abuse. You and your son can find a healthier way forward. Speak your truth gently but firmly. Help is available. You are strong, worthy and so very loved – never forget that.

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